Jilling Off

Recently, Giant wrote that he was surprised that I have tendencies towards being dominated. I can get where he’s coming from – outwardly I’m a bossy, in control woman (I do PR for a living) but seriously, if you’re ordering minions, printers, caterers and stupid clients around all day, don’t you think that you’d want to come home and be able to switch off totally too?

That is of course the superficial level of domination/sublimation, but unfortunately anything to do with sex has to go deeper. I like to think that I am amongst strong feminist women, so the idea that I want to be dominated and degraded does really not sit well with me as a feminist. I know there’s a difference between fantasy and reality though, and this is where I’m especially grateful to Dan Savage for explaining it so clearly:

Like many fetishes, his cuckold thing is most likely a subconscious erotic response to a sexually charged fear. While most of us learn to live with and occasionally conquer our fears without eroticizing them, a number of us respond to sexual fears or traumas by incorporating them into our erotic imaginations. Think of women—hip, together, progressive, feminist women—who act out rape fantasies; think of the homos—hip, together, out homos—who dress up like soldiers, cops, firemen and other stereotypically violent homophobic types.

So women fear rape, yet some develop a fetish for it. Gay men fear violent homophobes, yet some dress up like violent homophobes. And what do many straight men fear? Being cheated on, of course, and dealing with that particular brand of sexual humiliation.

So yeah, I think if I was imagining people grabbing me the way they did when I was 12, if I was fantasizing about leather jerkins and tattoos on bare chests,then that would be really troublesome. If I want someone to pull my hair, call me a dirty slut and maybe spank me a little, I’m okay with that.

When he asks me lights on or lights off, I don’t get it at first, and then I realise my mistake as the fluorescent lights flood the room with their harsh reality. But yet – this isn’t reality. How could this be real? I’m 19 stories up in an empty office building with him. I would like to be looking out the window at the Auckland by night, but it appears he has other ideas, as he comes up behind me, grabbing my ass, and kissing my neck. He guides me over to where his workspace is, and I know exactly what he’s after right here. I’ve sent him enough text messages about it, after all, and received enough to know how hard I make him when he’s sitting at his desk, trying to work, so this is my time to make up for all that.

I sink to my knees on the rough commercial carpet, and pull him closer. I struggle with his belt buckle, so he laughs at me, but just enough so that our eyes meet. He likes the show, so I take my time unbuttoning his fly, coy face on. He is hard already, a product of waiting for me outside the building, I’m sure, waiting for me to wrap my lips around his cock, but I don’t want to make it quite that easy for him. I pull his cock out of his underwear and put my mouth up to it, but I pause before licking around the tip, smiling as his eyes roll back in pleasure. Now I have a taste for his precum though, so I open my mouth wider, and try to take the whole shaft in at once, holding the base so I can retain control and not push beyond my gag reflex. I can tell he likes this a lot, although he is almost silent, because of the way his hand grabbing my head and the other reaching down to my breast.

“You saw the security card parked outside, right?” he laughs, as I reach further into his jeans to squeeze his balls.
“Do you think they’re watching us, right now?” I slide back from his cock, but take the time to bathe it, lapping my tongue all over every inch.
“Oh, no doubt,” he says, laughing. “Cameras everywhere”.
“I might as well give them a real show then,” I say, and pull off my tshirt. He takes the initiative, pulling down the cups of my bra to take a nipple into his mouth. His right hand travels up my thigh under my skirt.
“I’m surprised you’re wearing these” he says, running a finger along the crotch of my panties. I am set to protest my ignorance about this night’s expedition, but find myself merely gasping instead, as he starts to kiss my neck and my ear, as he slides his hand into my panties.

I’m still kneeling, and my jandals are scrabbling to hold my position on the course carpet as I spread my legs further to accommodate his fingers. He slides one finger up and down my labia, which I imagine are parting like the red sea to his Moses, but I stifle that image as he kisses me ferociously, pinning my mouth in place, as his finger trails up my wet opening to my clitoris. He’s the one laughing now as he circles it, and I gasp and lean forward onto his hands, I start to imagine how we would appear on security monitors, and think about how much trouble we could be in. That combines with the ache in my knee to want this to be over quickly, so I lean in more, and rub myself back and forth on his hand, clutching his shoulder for support. We kiss, and he sucks on my nipple and I feel all the sensations all over me – the cool-air awareness of all that bare skin in the office, the subservient position that I am, his mouth on mine and the piano chords his finger are dishing out across my pussy combine, and I am about to explode.

From the way I grab at him harder, and that my breath is coming in gasps, he knows that I am about to come, so he pulls me in tighter, and buries my face into his neck, so that when I cry out in orgasm I am not too loud. We grin at each other for a second, and kiss again as he tucks his cock back inside his jeans to be finished later. The security car is still parked outside when we exit the building, so I walk out all nonchalant, as if nothing happened, but the dampness of my panties would tell a whole different story.

There’s a hand on my waist and a boy buying me drinks, but it isn’t you. It’s inevitable though, that you would end up in the same bar at the same time as me, and when I see you across the room the line from Casablanca plays in my head.

Because it is what I am supposed to do, I nod in your direction in acknowledgment, and go on flirting with the perfectly nice boy that I’m talking to, but soon I feel my phone vibrate against my hip.

“Who is he?”

You shouldn’t be texting me this but at the same time though, I can feel my pulse start to race. Your eyes are still on me from across the bar, and you’re doing your best to look nonchalant. I excuse myself and walk towards the toilets. You meet me half way and pull me into the handicapped bathroom. Your grip on my arm sends electric shocks through me, and I feel myself getting wet. It’s been a long long time.

“So, if he’s so great, why are you in here with me?”

I don’t have an answer for you, I seem to have forgotten how to speak being this close to you again. Instead I reach for your face and pull you in. Our kiss is deep, hard and vicious with intensity. Your tongue is in my mouth as you push me up onto the sink counter, and I spread my knees to accommodate your hand. You laugh when you feel how wet I am, sliding a finger inside my panties. I jerk back against the mirror involuntarily, and your other hand grabs my breast hard. Your cock is hard against my thigh, and so I grab for your belt buckle, wriggling to help you pull my panties down and over my boots. “Fuck me,” I moan against your ear as you kiss my neck, “I want to feel you inside me again”.

You let go of me then to reach for my discarded handbag on the floor, knowing full well that I’m the kind of girl who always carries condoms for an occasion just like this. You pull your cock free from your jeans but stand motionless watching me touch myself, a finger circling around my clit, dipping in and out of my slippery cunt. As I arch my back with pleasure you remember yourself, and roll the condom on, sliding your cock into me straight away.

My legs lock around your waist, pushing you in deeper to me, deeper, always deeper. You hold my face in one hand, forcing me to look into your eyes as you thrust into me. I push back against you, one hand still rubbing my clit, the other steadying myself on your shoulder. “Do you like this?” you demand breathlessly, “do you like my cock better than his?” Your mouth is rough against mine, and you’re kissing me to stop me crying out. You know the answer to your question as I start to shake, orgasm rolling over me. You come too, closing your eyes only at the last minute, and I see the ecstasy in your face. We hold each other, trembling, for just a minute, and then you help me down from the counter. One last kiss and then we clean ourselves up with paper towels. You leave first.

I reapply my lipgloss, straighten up my hair and return to the boy at the bar. I don’t go home with him though.

You had asked me to come over a few days ago to help you fix a broken cupboard. Unfortunately I’m too busy and can’t get there until that night. When I get there you’re on your laptop in your room. When I walk in you jump and seem awkward. I sit down next to you on the bed and notice you’re blushing.

You tell me how another friend of yours came over earlier for coffee and fixed it then. I feel a short pang of jealousy and change the subject; so I ask about what you’re looking at on the net. You blush again, close the laptop and say how you were just thinking of something for Jillingoff.
 
I instantly formulate a plan.
 
I grin and slide up next to you. I touch your neck. Stroke your ear. My other hand sits on your knee and slowly traces up your thigh. You close your eyes and smile. And that’s when I grab your laptop and turn it back on. You try to get it back, clearly embarrassed by what you were looking at. I manage to pin you face down on the bed and wait for the laptop to load.
 
I should’ve known, you were looking at porn. Bondage porn. A girl has been tied up and is being “forced” to suck four big cocks while another woman holds a vibrator on the girl’s pussy. As I tease you about it you blush and look sheepish. 

I put the computer down where you can see the screen. And while I’ve still got you pinned I reach down and pull your skirt up to your waist. I’m surprised that you aren’t wearing any panties but I keep going. You’re obliging as I gently push your knees apart. I slide my hand up to your pussy and …stop. It’s already soaking wet and creamy, too wet.
 
I’m still a little annoyed that you asked another guy to fix your cupboard but did you fuck him too?
 
You turn your head back and look at me over your shoulder. Yes and his cock was huge, a lot bigger then mine. You tried sucking it but it was making you gag so you made him fuck you instead. His cock felt so good in your pussy that you came with just the tip inside you, and then came another three times before he finally came inside you.
 
You’re smirking at me. You purr that it’s ok, my small cock is still really adorable and how you would let me fuck you but you don’t know if you’ll feel much after his huge cock.
 
Normally I’d let you continue to do this (you know I love the humiliation). But not today, today you get punished.
 
You tell me to make you suck my cock. I spank you hard on the ass so you know I’m in charge (but I appreciate your enthusiasm. Instead I keep you face down facing the end of the bed, put some pillows between your still spread legs, exposing your pussy. I take your hands and tie them to the foot of the bed with a scarf you leave there for just such an occasion. Then I find your vibrator, turn it on and rest it against your clit. You start to grind but the vibrator falls down. I replace it and tell you if you want to enjoy it, you’re gonna have to stay still. You start moaning in equal parts annoyance and arousal.
 
I decide that I shouldn’t be the only one to see this so I open the curtains so the neighbours can watch if they want. You’re too busy concentrating to care.
 
I kiss your neck and slide my hand under you to get to your breasts. I kiss and bite your neck while I squeeze your nipples. You’re already close to cumming and as you’re about to you can’t help but grind your hips. The vibrator falls away and you cry out in frustration.
 
I laugh and turn it off. I keep one hand twisting and pinching your nipple. I slide my hand over your ass and down to your sopping wet pussy. I spread you open with my fingers. You’re so wet I can slide three fingers in without resistance. You moan and start grinding again. I pull out when it sounds like you’re going to cum.
 
Now you start begging…You’ll do anything to cum. You’ll suck my cock. You’ll let me fuck you. You’ll let me cum on your tits. But really I know you’d let me do that anyway. You need more teasing.
 
I let you roll you onto your back and reposition the pillows so that your pussy is still in the air. Just to be nice I suck your clit, running my tongue over it hard and fast. You almost cum straight away but I sense the orgasm start and break off, leaving you writhing and moaning.
 
I open your shirt and pull your breasts out of your bra. I circle one nipple with my tongue before sucking on it hard. You arch in ecstasy. I run my hand down over your pussy. I never stop moving it and only graze your clit every so often, every time I do you moan.
 
I push as many fingers as I can into your cunt. You immediately start fucking my hand, and I let you. But I’m really abusing your breasts now. Squeezing them hard in my other hand, pinching and pulling on the nipples. We didn’t figure out a safety word but I’ll know if you want to stop, we’ve done this before.
 
When I feel your pussy muscles tighten on my fingers I pull them out, dripping with your juices and put them in your mouth. Again you groan in frustration, but you also suck my fingers hard. When I pull them out you again beg for my cock in your mouth. The whole thing is making me incredibly hard so this time I oblige.
 
I stand up and take off my clothes (I am aware opening the curtains has backfired on me but it’s getting dark now). My cock is hard and twitching. A thick line of pre-cum is oozing down my shaft. I straddle your chest and touch the tip of my cock to your bottom lip, then trace it round your mouth. You seductively lick the pre-cum off your lips and smile. I put my cock back on your lips and reach back to gently start rubbing your pussy again. When you open your mouth to moan I thrust my cock in your mouth and start moving my fingers faster.
 
My fingers are circling your clit faster and faster while you try to focus on licking the tip of my cock. I quickly remove my hand and my cock and slide my body down between your legs. I slide my cock up and down your slick pussy, each time grinding into your clit. You’re too horny to speak and all you can say is “cock” and “fuck”.
 
I don’t let you have what you want (otherwise this wouldn’t be torture, would it). I rest the tip of my cock at the entrance to your pussy. You grind your hips, wanting me to cum inside you. The head presses against you and almost slides in, you’re so wet it wouldn’t take mush to slide my whole cock in. Instead I place my hands behind your knees and push your legs into the air, lie my cock on your clit and push myself against you. I want to cover my cock in your juices.
 
I switch around again before you even get close to coming and put my cock back on your mouth. This time you take it all in straight away. I move us into a 69. I hook my elbows behind your knnes and pull them up, I’m showing your pussy to anyone who can see in your window.
 
I suddenly realise that you are doing a great job sucking my cock and I’m about to cum. I lick your clit briefly and then down to your ass which I flick with my tongue and then, with my lower lip resting on your clit, I plunge my tongue inside you. I don’t know if you were expecting it or not but you jump when I do it and then start frantically moving against my face. Your moans of pleasure vibrate my cock and bring me even closer to cumming.
 
Finally I can’t take it anymore and I attack your clit with my tongue, moving it as fast as I can. And finally you begin to cum and I don’t stop.
 
Your body shakes with spasms as waves of extasy surge through it. Your movements and moaning are enough to set me off and and I cum down your throat, which seems to make you cum again.
 
Slightly exhausted I reach back and untie your hands. When I do you instantly grab my balls and squeeze them, then hold my cock in your mouth while sucking out as much cum as you can. I begin kissing your clit and soon you’re cumming on my face again .
 
Eventually I roll off and lie there dreamily. You ask why I’m smiling, you say that I still wasn’t as good as the other guy. Before I have a chance to do anything you have my arms tied over my head. You smile and sit with your pussy right by my face a leg draped over my chest. You start masturbating for me.
 
Now it’s your turn.

I’ve been a little bit busy, engaging in some very pleasant activities with someone who turned out to be one of the best lays I’ve had so far. He also gives great text and email, so I thought I’d give him a login to help fill Jilling Off up with thick juicy content. Nice people, meet Giant. He’s a feminist too, and he has a filthy mouth on him. I think you’ll all get along just fine.